Monday, August 6, 2007

Think Before You Cheat...

It's strange to think the songs we used to sing
the smiles, the flowers, everything...is gone
I found out about you
even now just looking at you...feels wrong
you say that you'd take it all back, given one chance
it was a moment of weakness and you said yes...

You should've said no, you should've gone home
you should've thought twice before you let it all go
you should've known that word bout what you did with her would get back to me...
and I should've been there in the back of you mind
and I shouldn't be asking myself why
you shouldn't be begging for my forgiveness at my feet...
you should've said no, baby and you might still have me

You can see that I've been crying and baby you know all the right things to say
but do you honestly expect me to believe we could ever be the same...
you say that the past is the past, you need one chance
it was a moment of weakness and you said yes...
You should have said no.
I can't resist...before you go, tell me this:
was it worth it...was she worth this
...no.


-------------------------------------------------
So while love is an AMAZING feeling and all, I'm starting to think that it definitely hinders your abilities to see when things are terribly wrong...even when people are telling it to you every day. Things with Shawn and I are and have been completely insane. I just couldn't do it though, it all came down to the point where everything was right in my face and I hit rock bottom. I'm tired of hearing apology after apology...especially when there's something new to apologize about every two weeks or so. I'm sorry, but no matter how many times you apologize to me, cheating on me will never EVER be okay. That's so disrespectful; and as hard as I've tried, it's become unforgivable.

I did EVERYTHING to make my relationship with Shawn work. Everyone knows that. I put so much into it, and for what? NOTHING. Being cheated on once again, even though he finally said he loved me, wanted to marry me, etc. I'm so freakin tired of being the one that puts everything in the relationship just to watch it fail. He and Nichole deserve each other, they really do. Things won't ever be done between them as much as they claim it is. Yes, I may be young, but I definitely know a lot more than that 25 year old "woman". If she's such a woman she might need to grow up a little and stop sleeping around, moving around from place to place and job to job, going out and getting drunk, and then coming home to her child. Real responsible. And to Shawn: You can't say that things have changed when you're still hanging out with her everyday. And saying sorry will never make anything better. You did me wrong....sooooooooo wrong... and there's no coming back. EVER. And aside from all the insanity, I've started hanging out with an amazinggg guy. Who just doesn't deserve to have to be put through this. I'm done.


Ugh. Just had to vent.

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